Good Lord, I can’t wait until I’m working at a place where (1) I don’t feel like every ounce of dignity/my soul is being taken away (2) my colleagues and I get treated with respect/are appreciated for the work we do (3) it pays well and (4) I leave feeling like I have a greater purpose than just making already rich people even more rich.
I had the most frustrating day at work, and I was only there for a few hours! It was that time of the week where the manager takes you aside and goes over all of your numbers for a previous week and the year. And once again, I was 103.9% to my sales goal, but instead of getting 55 out of 55 points, I only got 35 points because even though I was over my goal, I wasn’t over by enough. And I was 100% of my opening accounts goal, but only got 5 out of 15 points, because 100% just isn’t good enough. So, even though I pretty much rocked the shit out of my numbers this year, it looks like I’m doing a crappy job at my crappy job. And that makes me feel horrible because even though I totally should not be caring about stupid numbers, I HATE that I’m at or above 100% of all of my goals and it looks like I’m a total slacker.
My colleagues told me I shouldn’t be wasting any time worrying about this. And it’s not that I’m worried about this, because I’m not. I’m not worried about my job. I’m just epically frustrated that I work my ass off at my crappy job, only to get paid pennies for the thousands and thousands of dollars I know I’m making for the company, and then it looks like I’m a slacker because I’m only doing 100% or better and that’s just not enough.
Now that all of my thesis stuff is done, I am going to be starting an epic job hunt shortly. Like I wrote yesterday, I have absolutely no idea what kind of job I want. But I do know that I will NEVER AGAIN work for the company I am working for right now. And while I am thankful to be employed right now, I am also thankful that I know this job is not my career and that I will hopefully soon find another job.
But, enough about work and how it feels like my soul is being slowly ripped out from my core.
Today we kinda officially celebrated me being done with grad school. And by kinda celebrated, I mean my dad and I drove to Papa’s to get the four of us (me, dad, mom and brother) some cheesesteaks for dinner.
Papa’s is the closest thing we have to authentic Philly cheesesteaks in the Twin Cities. And they are damn tasty. They are almost as good as those we get when we’re actually in Philly. If you’ve never had a Philly cheesesteak in Philly, well then I just feel super sorry for you. They are heavenly. They are the ultimate comfort food. They remind me of when I was little… they remind me of my grandparents… they are just the taste equivalent of home. This is why I requested them for my celebratory meal… it’s like being hugged the entire time you’re eating dinner. Like my late grandparents were joining in on the celebration of me finishing graduate school. (They both died a few years before I made it into grad school, so they never will know that I got my Masters, or that my sister is in the middle of getting her doctorate, or that my brother almost has his Masters too… 😦 ) I know they would have been really proud of all of us, so as silly as it sounds, getting cheesesteaks today was my way of including them in my post-graduate school celebration.
And that’s really all that happened today… work and cheesesteaks. I’m getting ready to read for a bit before I go to sleep. I don’t have work tomorrow (thank goodness), so I can stay up for awhile and catch up on some reading I meant to do this week.
Oh, and my sister is coming to visit in a couple weeks!!!!! I have to participate in a golf outing with my parents, so she’s going to come up to be my golf partner since my brother can’t make it this year. Woot woot – I can’t wait to see her!!! I’m getting spoiled seeing both of my siblings in a matter of weeks like this. I just saw them both in May, and I just got to spend a week with my brother, and now I’ll get a few days with my sister 🙂 I love spending time with my family!!
Ah well, reading and sleep time
Have a good one