So…

I’m still kinda sick. I had to call off from work yesterday because I was still getting over my fever and I have a runny nose, sore throat and funky/swollen tonsils. By now, the fever is completely gone, but I’m still blowing my nose every couple minutes, my tonsils are still super lumpy and I haven’t eaten much in the last 3 days.

I do plan on going to work tomorrow, though. It’s a huge day and they were making sure everyone was going to be in, so I’ll just have to suck it up and go in LIKE A BOSS. I’ll just need to line my pockets with tissues and make sure I stay hydrated. There isn’t really anything I can do to make myself feel better. I’ve had tonsil problems since I was little… my tonsils are ginormous and they used to rub together in one, giant blob in the back of my throat. They have since separated (thanks to the widening of my mouth due to an expander I was painfully forced to wear in high school to correct my bite… my top teeth used to rest *inside* of my bottom teeth instead of outside of them… yeah. ouch.), but are still abnormally large. They get irritated more often than they should and sometimes get lumps all over them. It’ll go away soonish… it’s just a little uncomfortable, especially on top of the sore throat and runny nose.

But, seriously. I’m okay. I’m very used to all this by now.

So… (part deux)

It’s Tuesday. I wish it were Glee Tuesday, but we still have to wait one more week.

However, the people at Glee/Fox were kind (mean?) enough to release the full performance of one of the songs.

(SPOILERS FOR GLEE S3 EPISODE 15 – “Big Brother”)

In this episode, we meet Cooper Anderson – Blaine’s older brother (by 10 years). This places Cooper to be around 27 or 28 years of age and sets us up for some potentially angsty/unrequited sibling rivalry… at least that’s what it looks like from the video clip we got of one of their duets – “Somebody That I Used to Know”.

I’ll give you a minute to process that.

Powerful stuff, right?

Now, I have somehow managed to never hear the original version of this song before, as performed by Gotye featuring Kimbra. I’m more than okay with this. From what I gather, it’s a song about people who used to be in a romantic/intimate relationship. That is obviously not the same context for the Glee version (on Glee, it’s a set of brothers who have grown apart), but I like how the same words can be used to express two completely different kinds of relationships.

In the Glee version, Blaine seems to be singing about how he grew apart from his brother and how his brother once cherished their relationship (“so happy I could die”), but then screwed his brother over and grew estranged (the lyrics about changing numbers and packing records, etc…). Cooper later sings these same lyrics at his brother, so it kinda makes you wonder if one of the boys is more at fault than the other, or if the estrangement was mutual, albeit truly undesired by either Anderson Brother.

Since we have never heard anything about Cooper Anderson before, one can only speculate about his upbringing and relationship with his little brother, Blaine. Ten years is a huge age gap when you’re younger… I mean, I’m only two years apart from either of my siblings and at times that seemed like ages. So, 10 years is a big age gap, and it could be big enough for Cooper not to realize how his little brother felt throughout various times of their upbringing. You also have to figure he’s probably been gone for a lot of Blaine’s teenage years, so he may have missed out on a lot of important things… like when Blaine came out, or when Blaine got beat up after the Sadie Hawkins dance, etc…

I obviously have way too much time on my hands to think about these characters and this show. But, I’m invested in the show – I’m very invested in Blaine (since Darren Criss is one of my favorite performers), and now I’m invested in Cooper (Matt Bomer, how I love you so on White Collar… damn).

Plus, Glee hasn’t been on in, like, 7 weeks. This hiatus has given myself and other Glee fans waaaaay to much time to speculate.

I’m legit interested in Blaine and Cooper’s relationship not only because I love the two actors playing these parts, but because neither Blaine nor Cooper were originally part of this show. Blaine was only introduced last season and has since risen to one of the main(ish) characters of the show. I’m very interested in his back story since it has changed soooooo much over the course of a season and half. (Like, remember when he was introduced in Season 2 Episode 6 “Never Been Kissed” as an older, confident mentor to Kurt… only to question his own sexuality 8 episodes later… only to be revealed as a year younger than Kurt during Season 3 Episode 2? Yeah… Blaine’s been all over the map thus far… it’ll be nice to get some back story, especially back story that has nothing to do with his relationship with Kurt. I’m all for individual character plot lines, and not just ones that deal with significant others.)

Plus, I really just want to know what leads up to this scene because I want to know what causes Blaine to express that amount of emotions in 2 minutes and 44 seconds. This isn’t just a one-off thing… this kid obviously has had some pent-up issues with his brother that he needs to get off his chest via song.

The amount of feeling and emotion that both Darren Criss and Matt Bomer put into this song is ridiculous and deserves the most epic of slow claps. They are both super talented actors and performers and their commitment to this song and ability to showcases everything they’re feeling on their faces and in their body language like that is really powerful and special. My heart can’t help but to break when I watch this video clip… the amount of hurt going on between those two is crazy.

Watching this video actually reminded me a lot of the song “Being Alive” from Company. The comparison was there for me because of the repeated use of the word “somebody.”

Though I haven’t heard the Gotye version of the song, I’m assuming that the word “somebody” in the phrase “somebody that I used to know” can be interpreted both as “somebody” *and* “some body”.

Think about that for a second…

“Somebody” you used to know could be a person… any person. But, “some body” you used to know… to me, that implies a more intimate action.

In the Glee version of this song, I take the song to be interpreted as “somebody” even though toward the end of the song, they emphasize the latter half of the word.

In Company, there’s an exchange of dialogue between the main character, Robert, and his friend Amy that ends with “you need to marry somebody, not someBODY.” Then, later during “Being Alive,” Amy interjects again…

AMY: Blow out the candles, Robert, and make a wish. *Want* something!
Want *something*!

And then Robert continues to sing…

ROBERT:
Somebody, hold me too close,
Somebody, hurt me too deep,
Somebody, sit in my chair
And ruin my sleep
And make me aware
Of being alive,
Being alive.

Somebody, need me too much,
Somebody, know me too well,
Somebody, pull me up short
And put me through hell
And give me support
For being alive,
Make me alive.

Make me confused,
Mock me with praise,
Let me be used,
Vary my days.
But alone is alone, not alive.

Somebody, crowd me with love,
Somebody, force me to care,
Somebody, make me come through,
I’ll always be there,
As frightened as you,
To help us survive
Being alive,
Being alive,
Being alive!

Again.. powerful stuff, right?

(side note – I saw the revival of Company on Broadway and actually cried when Raul Esparza sang “Being Alive.” From the moment he lets out that guttural, primal yell right through the end of that song, there were just silent tears streaming down my face. It was such a powerful, private moment and I couldn’t help but cry. It’s still really hard for me to watch that scene… it’s just so moving :/ )

Well… I’m going to get going. Now that I’m feeling all the feelings.

Have a good one.

Sorry I’ve been sucking at blogging lately. BUT, I have some time now and today was busy, so I will post about things in the order they happened and will save SPACE Tour videos for the end.

1. When I woke up this morning, one of the first things I saw online was this:

I still kinda can’t believe this is happening and I get to go see it. H2$ is pretty much my favorite stage musical of all time (even though I haven’t ever seen it on stage before…). I saw the movie when I was in elementary school and have seen it a bajillion times since. I’ve listened to the Original Broadway Cast recording and the 1994 revival over and over and over again (for some reason I can’t bring myself to listen to the DanRad version… I’m not a super huge fan of his singing voice). This clip just made me super happy, even though it doesn’t really show much except for some BTS on his photo shoot.

2. Also released today was “Perfect” from tomorrow’s episode of Glee … c/o Rollingstone.com

(SPOILERS FOR THOSE WHO DON’T KNOW THE PLOT OF EPISODE 7)

So, Kurt and Blaine duet on Perfect. And it’s PERFECT. No, seriously… listen to it. I think the plot of the episode is that Finn and the other Glee kids are singing women’s songs to Santana after her Episode 6 outing. In my head canon, Blaine and Kurt start off singing this song to Santana, but part way through the song they are really just singing to each other and Blaine has tears in his epic Heart Eyes for Kurt. Please let this be accurate…

I have listened to this song an embarrassing number of times today. #noregrets The Pink version is already one of my favorite songs ever, so this is just the icing on the “Perfect” cake. The lyrics to this song (minus the rap… bah) are so beautiful. Catch me in an emotional state listening to this song and I will have legit tears in my eyes.

3. So, I finally saw J. Edgar.

I honestly didn’t know a whole heck of a lot about the man before I saw the movie and was definitely a bit enlightened by the content of the film. While I thought he was a bit paranoid and full of himself, I found his relationships in the film super compelling.

(SPOILERS IF YOU HAVEN’T SEEN THE MOVIE)

So, I was a bit unaware of Hoover’s personal life. Do I take this movie as a 100% completely accurate depiction of Hoover’s life? NO. But I found the relationships with his mother, his secretary and Clyde Tolson to be very moving.

I thought Hoover had a good relationship with his mother until that scene where he tells her he doesn’t like to dance, and he doesn’t like to dance with women. When his mom reminded him about a boy from his childhood (“Daffy” – short for “Daffodil”) who killed himself and then said “I’d rather have a dead son than a daffodil” (or something along those lines), my heart BROKE.

I thought Hoover’s relationship with his secretary was interesting. I liked watching it progress throughout their time together. It was beyond awkward watching their “date” in the Library of Congress, especially when he dove in for a kiss that was utterly rejected. But, they overcame that and they ended up being quite the team. It’s amazing how much respect there must have been between them – her keeping all of his secret files for him like that.

But, my favorite relationship of the film was between Hoover and Tolson. Was Hoover gay? I tried to Google that, but didn’t really get a solid yes or no answer. (For the record, the answer may be out there … I didn’t spend a whole hell of a lot of time google Hoover’s sexual history. That’s his own business.) But I was beyond intrigued by Hoover and Tolson’s working and personal relationship in this film.

Tolson doted on Hoover. He looked at him fondly and was very caring and giving with his time and actions to the other man. Even I swooned a bit when Tolson made Hoover promise that they would never miss lunch or dinner appointments with each other whether it was a good or bad day for them.

The first time they sort of held hands in the car (Hoover placed his hand on top of Tolson’s), my heart stopped because it was such an intimate moment. However, their hotel scenes made my heart hurt. Scene One: When Hoover told Tolson, “I care so very much for you, Clyde,” to which Tolson took him by the hand and responded, “I love you, Edgar” and then Hoover changed subjects to talk of a lady friend he was considering marrying… my jaw dropped and my heart broke. It stayed broken during the fight scene.

Scene Two: My heart legit hurt during this sequence. The way Tolson snapped because Hoover was mistreating his feelings. I read some online comment on some message board that said commenter was disappointed in the fight because it looked like the two were having a cat fight. UMMMMMMM NO. Those men threw punches. Legit punches. Out of anger and love. And then when Tolson kissed him… and Hoover’s forehead wrinkled and he just sort of melted for a fraction of a second. Holy shit. He must have been so conflicted in that moment. Tolson had every right to walk away… but Hoover calling him back “Don’t leave me! Clyde, please! Clyde, I’m sorry!”. GAH. MY HEART.

I thought DiCaprio and Hammer were amazing in this movie. Their old man makeup was hella distracting, but they both gave fine performances despite what they looked like as old men. Clint Eastwood is an amazing director. My biggest complaint besides the makeup was that creepy boy from Gossip Girl (Ed Westwick?) was in the film. BOOOOOOOO

4. SPACE Tour

So, as I mentioned yesterday, StarKid just got done with their month-long SPACE tour. I bookmarked a shit-ton of videos from youtube and I haven’t gotten a chance to watch them all yet. HOWEVER, here are a few of my favorites from when Darren joined up with the group on the last couple concerts of the tour:

Status Quo – I f-ing love this song. And I love it with 5-part harmony. And tambourines.

To Have A Home – Darren fans just know what this song means on every possible level. It’s just really special to get to watch him sing this, okay?

Gotta Get Back to Hogwarts – GAH, I LOVE THEM ALL SO MUCH πŸ™‚

And, finally, Not Alone. This is just one of the best anthems… it’s got such a great message. Plus, it’s super special getting to see him perform this because it’s been used now for so many things and all of them represent something amazing and positive. Also, Darren is freakin’ talented when it comes to performing. Obviously.

So yeah… there are waaaaaaaaaaaaaaay more SPACE videos on youtube and tumblr. Check them out.

Imma go read… remember, tomorrow is Glee Tuesday

Have a good one

I’m tired, so I’m not going to write an epic monologue, even though I’m pretty sure I could. (Tired Katie is known to just keep typing…)

Before I went and saw Crazy Stupid Love, though, I did do some job hunting this morning. I applied for several jobs and then bookmarked a whole lot more that I’ll need to write cover letters for. I will be working on those tomorrow, in addition to applying for more jobs. Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay

(that is where a sarcasm font would really, really come in handy)

Why is it that most of the super cool jobs or internships are unpaid? I asked this question to my mom today… she said something along the lines of, “Well, you could always do something like that around here.” To which I sadly replied, “I don’t want to be in Minnesota anymore.” She replied with a kind, “I know.” I have to get out. I love being with my parents and everything (I am super lucky to have the best parents on the planet who I actually really enjoy spending time with), but I need to not be here anymore. I’m going to start crying if I keep typing about this right now, so new topic…

Crazy Stupid Love

What a very appropriate film title.

The plot was a bit far-fetched (there really is no way that that many family members would have interconnected love stories like that… come on), but on a whole it was an enjoyable film. I like Emma Stone and Ryan Gosling a lot and I definitely laughed the hardest during the Dirty Dancing bit πŸ™‚ And Josh Groban was in the movie?!?!?!?! How was I not aware that Josh Groban was in the movie until I saw him up on the screen and literally said out loud, “What?! Josh Groban!” (My mom and I were the only two people in the theater, so we could say stuff out loud w/o bothering anyone.)

Since I am tired, I am definitely not going to be typing up my opinions about the different relationships in the movie. I will say, though, that everyone definitely had their faults – some more than others – but I was okay with the cliche of an ending for all the plot lines. For the record, though, I thought the whole “Nana” thing/reveal was pretty smart, as I honestly didn’t see that one coming.

Well… I’m gonna read some more and then sleep. I slept in today and then fell asleep twice throughout the day. My body is obviously trying to tell me something…

Have a good one

So, instead of going to bed at a reasonable time last night, I was up reading some blogs… and somehow I ended up on Facebook (of course). There’s a Darren Criss concert in Chicago in August, and I really really wanted to go, but I didn’t want to go by myself. So, out of pure curiosity and epic tiredness, I asked if anyone from around where I live is going to the concert and if so, if they wanted to carpool.

The beauty of the Interweb, is within mere minutes, I had somewhere to stay, a group of people to go with, and now have a super awesome weekend awaiting me in August.

And those who know me best, know that I’m not usually this spontaneous about anything. I’m usually the one making lists, planning ahead, and sticking to a schedule.

But you know what – I deserved a little crazy right now. I wanted to go to the concert, so guess what… I’m going. And it’s going to be f**king epic. And I’m going to meet a ton of new people. I’m going to see a concert *and* a play. I’m going to spend a lot of time with people I don’t know at all. But the best part is, even though I don’t know anyone, we all already have a common bond. So, we automatically have something to talk about, something that links us all, regardless where we are from or who we are.

I kinda needed this right now. More than I would probably care to admit.

In the past year, I lost two of my closest friends. They’re both still very much alive, but our paths haven’t crossed in a very, very long time. The kicker is, I know why this happened. But, it’s not my place to reinsert myself in either person’s life. These friendships fell apart for very, very different reasons. But at the same time, the reasons are super similar. I know this is all sorts of cryptic, but it can’t be helped.

But, I can say (well, write), that it’s been really hard trying to move past both losses. And I know I haven’t quite completely found my footing yet. But, I have a couple people who are still in my corner… and thankfully I’m seeing one of them next week πŸ™‚

I cannot wait to go see my sister next week! I talked to her a bit this morning to tell her about my trip to Chicago. She told me I was crazy, but she was happy for me. We lived together for 4 years… she knows me pretty well. But I think even she doesn’t quite get that I can be more fun than a lot of people give me credit for.

True, I was never a huge party-goer. I’ve only ever gotten drunk twice and I don’t plan on that ever happening again. I am always thinking about the consequences of actions, and value the practice of saving instead of instant gratification. I keep my guard up a lot and am not a huge fan of big crowds.

But, I have my moments. And this Chicago trip is definitely going to be one of them. I’m actually really looking forward by being surrounded by a bunch of people who are all going to be there for the same reason I am – Darren Criss and his music. It’s kinda nice feeling like a part of a community – a part of something special – a part of something bigger than myself. *shrug* Sometimes it’s just nice to fit in, you know? (The best part is, this concert is during a huge Pride festival in Chicago. And as a straight girl who is 100% for gay rights, it’s going to be extra awesome to get to be a part of this event. I am going to be surrounded by amazing people the whole weekend… I just know it πŸ™‚ )

Needless to say, after initiating plans for Chicago last night before I went to bed, I had trouble sleeping because I was so excited. I literally was smiling too much to fall asleep.

I was still really jazzed about the trip for most of today. Work kinda brought me back down to reality, though. People were double checking that I was doing my job right. I was, as far as I knew. No one ever properly trained me… so even though I’ve been there for more than several months, I often feel like I’m flying blind. I ask so many questions, which I’m sure people hate, but I need to make sure I’m doing stuff right because it seems to change at the blink of an eye. I hate feeling like I don’t know what I’m doing even though my job is obviously not rocket science.

No one came to break me, so I was stuck in my work area for my entire shift. My stomach was ready to start eating itself. So, when I was done, I walked as fast as I could to my locker… and for a split second I thought my purse had been stolen. I switched purses from the one I normally use and forgot my lock in my other bag, so I had to risk putting my purse in a locker w/o a lock. I was praying to anyone up there who would listen for my purse not to be stolen. (I pray every night, always first for my family and friends’ health, safety and happiness… but this afternoon, I admit I was a bit greedy and was just focusing on my purse not getting stolen. Sorry.) I wrote the locker number down, but of course my eye was drawn to the locker that was hanging open (and empty) and thought that was mine… but it wasn’t. It was the one *next* to it. Phew.

I drove home, belting The Book of Mormon songs all the while. “You and Me (But Mostly Me)” and “Man Up” are still my favorites πŸ™‚

I got home and had dinner with my parents. I told my mom how thankful I was for her and my dad and apologized for not telling them that more when I was little. My parents are the best. Hands down.

We watched some Modern Family and Happy Endings reruns and then I headed downstairs to type this and then go to sleep. For reals this time.

I’m off for a few days, so I will be job hunting and making a bunch of mix CDs for my trip. Mix CDs are the only thing I like about driving. True Story.

Have a good one!

Oh my, what a day, what a day. I am completely worn out between last night’s Glee Live and then spending the whole of today at Valleyfair, an amusement park in Shakopee, MN.

So, last night’s Glee Live was pretty awesome. I posted some pictures on yesterday’s post, so you should check those out, if you want πŸ™‚

We had pretty sweet seats – second row on the balcony, right in the center. LXD was the opening act, and they were amazing… but I didn’t get any good pictures of them.

I really didn’t get (m)any good pictures the whole night, which sucked. I ended up spending most of the actual concert watching the show through the 2″ screen on the back of my camera instead of actually watching the Glee kids perform. So, I’ll have to youtube (or tumblr) some of the songs from the show last night. Especially the Warblers stuff… I really was having a hard time with my camera by that point, and I wasn’t quite 100% able to focus on the Dalton boys singing and dancing. What I did see, though, was AMAZING.

The whole show was pretty great. My biggest complaint was that Lea Michele didn’t perform “Don’t Rain on My Parade.” That is one of my favorite Glee numbers of all time, and she sang it at the previous concerts this summer. But, some of the cast is sick (if you follow them on Twitter, you probably knew this), so it’s understandable if they can’t quite keep up with everything all the time. This summer tour has got to be grueling for them – pretty much a different city every day or so. Today, if you follow any of their Tweets, you’ll know they were in Minneapolis until late last night, then the main cast (minus Darren) flew to Indianapolis while the Warblers (plus Darren, it seems… and one would assume this was his choice so he could spend more time with his Warblers friends?) took a bus down I-39 S (which I totally just did this drive about a week or so ago en route to Athens, OH) to the venue in Indy. And, I just saw on Twitter that tonight’s Indy show is over and they’re headed to Chicago. Busy, busy, busy.

I was worn out just watching their production last night – I can’t imagine doing that almost night after night for a month or so. Props to them, because the show was awesome. High energy. Very entertaining. Some numbers were a bit pitchy here and there, but that’s too be expected… it’s not like they sing live on the show each week. So, the fact that most of them sing live on the tour is pretty great.

I had a patchy night’s sleep last night, and then dragged myself out of bed earlyish b/c my brother and I had plans to go to Valleyfair, an amusement park in MN.

We did go – and it was a lot of fun, but it totally wore us both out. We both agreed that we’re getting too old to be galavanting around an amusement park… especially when we were surrounded by school kids the whole day.

It actually wasn’t too bad, though. The longest we had to wait for a ride was 30 minutes, and that was for the first thing we went on. Everything else we only had to wait 2-15 minutes, which wasn’t horrible at all. And really, the only reason we had to wait any more than 10 minutes for a few rides was because we always wanted to sit in the front row of the roller coasters. Which we did on all but one… and for that one, we rode in the very back.

We went on 6 different roller coasters, but one of them we rode twice. Then we went on this giant swing-esque thing. And then I rode the Rip Tide by myself b/c my brother was worn out and didn’t want to go on it. But, since I like crazy rides that make you go upside down a bunch of times, I wanted to ride it. So I did. πŸ™‚

It was really great hanging out with my brother the whole day. We get along really well when it’s just the two of us (we have an older sister… so when it’s the 3 of us, it usually gets to be 2 against 1… but when it’s only any 2 of us at a given time, then we get along like BFFs). He and I are more similar than one might think, though we haven’t always been like this. But, it was really great being able to talk some stuff out with him and realize that we aren’t the only ones who think what we think. He’s a good brother, and I’m super thankful for him. It’s been great being able to spend time with him this past week. He’s visiting until Monday, and then he’ll be working for the summer in another state, so then I won’t see him again until the end of July. But, we’ve had a lot of fun in the past week, and we have a few more days of shenanigans left.

This evening we just kind of chilled in the house since everyone was so worn out. We finished watching Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part I – we were watching it with the bits of extras/commentary on the Blu-ray. Very interesting indeed. Then, it was time for a Glee re-run… “Silly Love Songs”

Now, I made an epic post about this episode when it first aired.

I have seen it many times since (thank you, iTunes), but my mom had never seen it before. So, I forced her to watch it, especially because several songs from this episode were performed at the concert last night, and I wanted her to have some context.

But, since this is one of my favorite episodes of the show thus far, I was more than happy to watch it again, especially with my mom because I get a kick out of her commentary.

Toward the beginning of the episode, when Blaine and Kurt are in the coffee shop and Blaine is telling Kurt that he has feelings for someone and wants to sing him a song on Valentine’s Day, my mom turned to me and said, “Is he talking about Kurt?” I smiled and said “no” and she was like, “What?! Who is he going to sing to?” I said, “The Gap Guy.” She said, “I don’t know who that is.” I told her to just keep watching… πŸ™‚

We finished the episode and my mom liked “Silly Love Songs” a lot, especially the “Silly Love Songs” performance that closed the episode. She actually laughed out loud at Blaine’s facial expressions while he was singing to Santana about “sometimes it [love] doesn’t come at all”.

I could watch this episode over and over again (well, minus the Finn and Quinn stuff… they piss me off so much in this episode. All that cheating – bah). But, I LOVE all of the Puck and Lauren stuff. But mostly, I love all the Blaine and Kurt stuff (of course).

“When I Get You Alone” is still one of my favorite numbers from the season.

That song is just entirely inappropriate for a high school kid to be singing to a slightly older crush. *That’s* what makes it such a brilliant song choice… because this is a huge moment for the Kurt/Blaine relationship. I know I talked about this in my “Silly Love Songs” post, but this is the episode where Kurt really takes Blaine off of that pedestal and the two are really equals in their relationship (which at this point is still just friendship).

This is the episode where Kurt (and the audience) sees that Blaine isn’t perfect. Blaine has flaws. Blaine doesn’t know everything. He even confesses to Kurt, “I don’t know what I’m doing.” That second coffee shop scene is one of my most favorite scenes in the entire show thus far because it’s such a big moment for Kurt (who is still my favorite character… though Burt Hummel and Blaine Anderson are creeping in on this top spot, so much so that it might be a three-way tie depending on how Season 3 goes). I can’t find the clip on youtube, but trust me, it’s a great scene.

Damn, I just love this show πŸ™‚

And I love it even more now that I got to see the cast perform.

Well, I should get to bed. I am waaaaaaay tired. And I don’t know what’s in store for tomorrow, but I’m sure a full night’s sleep can’t hurt.

Have a good one

So, today marks the fourth anniversary of my grandfather’s death (my dad’s dad).

I think about him every day and even though I am so sad that he’s gone, I can’t help but smile. The man made me laugh πŸ™‚

I have so many great memories of my grandfather… most of them were “you had to be there” situations, or stories that my dad told me from before I was born. My grandfather (we called him “Pop Pop”) was a very, very funny man. I liken him to a Jewish Archie Bunker. He had some pretty choice things to say about other people, but he was an equal opportunity offender. Even though I knew a lot of the stuff that was coming out of his mouth wasn’t entirely PC, just the manner in which he said it was funny. He could have done stand up.

I was lucky that I got to spend a decent amount of time with my Pop Pop in the first 24 years of my life. We visited him and my Grammy a few times a year, and then later in life, my sister and I would go visit them on our way to New York City. In the last year or so, I would call him up during my breaks at work and we would talk about movies. He’s the one who introduced me to “Inside the Actors Studio” and would suggest various movies or books that I should read.

He had a think Philly accent that I can still hear in my head any time I want. He used to call my siblings and I “bum” for some reason. He would also call me a Philistine because I didn’t like mustard or salt on my soft pretzels.

There’s just so much stuff that reminds me of him – the birthday candle, the penguin game, him catching a newspaper on fire in the dining room, how his sandwiches always tasted better than any other sandwich, his “triple spin” off the diving board, him falling asleep often holding a beverage, Pop driving (holding your hands at 5 and 7), how when he was driving my brother and I back to his house from the King of Prussia mall he made a left turn from the center lane and I thought we were all going to die right then and there, Drug Emporium, and the list goes on and on…

My grandfather was a great man. He took care of everyone but himself. He was very loving to us. He was a great cook. He was a funny guy. He told great stories. He knew everything about everything it seemed. I just miss him a lot.

The day he died, I was by myself at the apartment I shared with my sister in Indiana. (She was in Michigan for some band thing.) My mom called and told me my Pop Pop was in the hospital and not doing well and that my dad had gone to be with him. I didn’t even know he was sick. I cried a lot, because this was the worst thing that had happened to me in my entire life. I was alone and I didn’t know what to do.

So, I grabbed my car keys (mind you, I had only gotten my license 2 days prior) and I drove all over town trying to find the 2-disc edition of Harry Potter and Goblet of Fire. Don’t ask me why I did this, because I still don’t know. But I was determined to find that DVD. I literally drove from one side of town to the other and back again, twice. I almost got run over by a semi truck in the parking lot outside of Cheeseburger in Paradise. Tears were streaming down my face the whole day, and I just remember talking to myself and trying to calm myself down.

I couldn’t find the Harry Potter DVD, so I ended up buying the 2-disc edition of Batman Begins. Once I got back home, I made some popcorn, grabbed my Batman Buddy, and climbed into my sister’s bed (she wasn’t home – she didn’t have to know). Through my tears, I watched all of the extras on the second disc and then watched the movie.

Later that night, one of my parents called to tell me that my Pop Pop died. I lost it again and just cried to myself because there was nothing else I could do. When my sister got home that weekend, we hugged and cried together. It was one of, if not the, lowest point in my life thus far.

What really made me sad was I had called my grandfather the day before during my break at work. He always picked up, but that day he didn’t. I left some sort of message joking that I hoped he was out having fun and enjoying himself. Little did I know he was already in the hospital. 😦

But, even though that was a really, really horrible time in my life, I can only look back on my relationship with my grandfather and feel an overwhelming amount of love. I know he loved me and I loved him. And really, that’s the best a granddaughter can hope for πŸ™‚

So, I miss you Pop. I miss you every day. And I will continue to miss you every day for as long as I live.

***

In other news… today my blog kinda exploded. Last night I was just hoping to finally reach 10,000 views, but because of my post about last night’s Glee episode, I will now cross 11,000 views within the hour. Today I got over 1,000 views… 1/11 of the total views on my blog… my mind grapes are blown. (Well, I just checked my blog stats – I am at 11,0006 total views, and 1,027 views for the day. Day-yum.)

I know that most of these people will probably never come across this blog again, but I am beyond astonished that that many people have checked out my blog… especially the 1,300+ people who have looked at my blog in the past 2 days because of that Glee post. I don’t expect this to happen ever again, but it’s kinda neat for right now. Makes me feel like my writing matters to someone πŸ™‚

See, I’m still having massive problems with my thesis, even though I am defending it on Tuesday. I cannot wait until this whole process is over. I am just feeling like the worst scholar of all time because I feel I am having such petty conflicts with my thesis chair. Hopefully he’ll let me know what kind of presentation he wants for the thesis defense. I’ve asked him two or three times in the past week because he never addresses that part of my email, only some formatting issue that is really neither here nor there. BAH!

I had to work tonight, so I missed American Idol and one episode of Happy Endings. I did catch the second episode of Happy Endings… not gonna lie, I am a little bit in love with Adam Pally.

Have a good one

So, did you watch Saturday Night Live last night? It was not the best episode, by far, but there were moments of wonderfulness. Most notably, the cartoon-turned-live action Ambiguously Gay Duo bit.

This just made me wish even more that Jon Hamm would either join the cast (j’adore him on Mad Men, but he would do so well on SNL), or at least host every other week. I loved his and Jimmy Fallon’s commitments to those characters (normally voiced by Stephen Colbert and Steve Carell… who were totally in the sketch too).

Another highlight of the show was Chris Colfer in the “What Up with That?” sketch. Granted, he didn’t have any lines, but it’s just nice to see my favorite Glee person as a guest on SNL. I could totally see him hosting sometime next season. (Of other Glee people, I could see Darren Criss or Lea Michele hosting as well. Criss has the potential to be Justin Timberlake-funny, while Michele could probably pull off an episode in the same vein as Miley Cyrus. More singing in sketches than having to be physically funny… But that’s just my opinion.)

Anyway…

So, I actually slept last night! I don’t know why or how, but it happened. I woke up at 9:00… and then had to quickly get dressed and scarf down some cereal because my mom and I had to be out of the house by 9:45ish for a 10:30 screening of Bridesmaids. It was PACKED.

I had such high hopes for Bridesmaids.

Those hopes were met and then exceeded… Bridesmaids was hilariously funny and seriously touching/heartfelt all at the same time. I loved it. I would see it again. I can’t wait to own the DVD.

Co-written by lead actress (and SNL staple) Kristen Wiig, Bridesmaids showcased one woman’s struggle to piece together her downward spiraling life as her best friend (Maya Rudolph, one of my comedy idols) gets engaged, prepares for her wedding, and ultimately gets married.

Wiig’s character was surrounded by the good (cop Rhodes, played by the ridiculously adorable Chris O’Dowd), the bad (Jon Hamm’s douche of a f**k buddy), and the crazy (the other bridesmaids, most notably Rose Byrne and Melissa McCarthy… just amazing performances by both).

I won’t spoil the major plot points for anyone who hasn’t seen it yet, but I will say that there were points in the movie where I was laughing so hard I was crying and there were other points where I was really relating to Wiig’s character and just thinking a lot about relationships between best friends and how hitting bottom is an opportunity to reassess oneself and work toward picking yourself up and moving forward.

It would appear that holy matrimony has been a topic I have somehow become surrounded by as of late. There is a wedding this weekend in Ohio, which unfortunately I will not be able to attend 😦 It’s for a girl who is pretty much the Maya Rudolph to my Kristen Wiig. And I would say that right now, we’re at the point in our Bridesmaids where there hasn’t been communication for quite some time. But that doesn’t mean that I don’t think about her every day (which I do), or don’t miss her (which I do), or don’t love her with all my heart (which I do).

When I visited my sister, there was a lot of wedding talk too. She and I probably watched 10 episodes of “Say Yes to the Dress” and discussed her potentially marrying her current boyfriend and what role I would have in the wedding party (Maid of Honor…).

My sister is not engaged, but she and her boyfriend have talked about getting married at some point. I think that’s pretty cool. I’m glad my sister has someone that she wants to spend the rest of her life with. But what I’m really thankful for, is that she and I are still close. We might not get to talk as much as we used to (we lived together for 4 years, so we used to get to talk and hang out almost all the time πŸ™‚ ), but we talked about how we will always be not only sisters, but friends. And that makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside.

(btw – watching Survivor right now. I haven’t watched all season, but tonight’s the finale. I hope Boston Rob wins. This is his 4th Survivor… he deserves the million for that feat alone.)

In addition to seeing Bridesmaids with my mom, she and I also played a bunch of rounds of ping-pong. Though she still won almost all of the games, I finally wore her down and beat her during our last game. Playing left-handed no less… I am more and more convinced that I was born left-handed but was taught to be right-handed. Besides being a better ping-pong played with my left hand, I also throw footballs and frisbees better with this hand. I bowl better using my left hand. I always have to have my purse on my left shoulder. I’m pretty sure I always hold my microphone in my left hand.

After ping-pong, we finished watching the third episode of Sherlock. Oh, how I wish the Second Series was already on Netflix. (It hasn’t even aired yet on television, so of course there is no way that it would be on Netflix yet. I don’t even know when the Second Series is going to come out…) What an amazing series thus far, though. In just three episodes, I am completely hooked. I love how it’s set in the present day. I love the bro-chemistry between Holmes and Watson. I love the music. I love the pace of the show. It just makes for brilliant television.

Well… that’s about it, I guess.

I have to work tomorrow night from 6-9:15. During the day, I’m going to start putting together some sort of presentation for my thesis defense. I suck at Power Points (I’ve only ever made 2 in my entire life…), but it’ll be good to go back through all of my data and results and really have a good grasp on everything before I go onto the thesis defense chopping block next week.

Have a good one